i love to sing

i love to sing. love to listen to my own voice. to go for the highest notes to the deepest tone.

i am not the best in the world. i'm not even one of the good singers in my gang. but i love to sing. its the only time i can feel my emotions running. the only time i can really feel alive. every part of me brigthens up and i let the emotions fill me, without feeling restricted, without caring how others look at me. its me without the world and just me.

i love singing.

now to find the person that loves singing with me. (=

there's a reason why I hate FB and MSN...

sigh...

just saw some status updates on FB...

a pang of melancholy stuck me. part of me really missed w115... missed hanging out there...

but more importantly, regret. regret and unfulfillment.
i was in a place where i constantly felt that i was not good enough and not recognised. i was constant dumped shoved aside. and just like the many parts of my life. cg became a job. there was not interaction beyond the daily prayer meetings, cg attendance, member's growth, member's well being. it was a sad sad time in my life. the stress was overwhelming. the need to be accepted was so strong.

though i understand that i need to take responsiblity for the results, that on some level i landed myself in that situation. but sadly, beyond the many rational converstations that are sounding off, the emotional tempremental one echos errily that its "NOT MY FAULT!"

well.. anyway like most unhappiness, this has past and my life has moved on. i'm in a happy cg now. no stress, everyone's cordial and my life is picking up. i'm in a good place now. i'm living my life. the friends i have now are the only ones i need.

i love my life. and everything i do, its for the betterment of my life!

i love myself!

Betterment of oneself

last paper coming in 2 days and i have yet to touch my books.. pretty much screwed. but nonetheless i really hope that things works out well at the end.

financial wise. this is my lowest point in life... i think i am spiraling into financial disaster... The army's political move to withdraw the july bonus really hurt alot and sent most of my plans down the drain. now i have to start another one. Good thing out of this whole mess is that I am learning to scrimp. Honestly, when you are that deep in shit, you gotta learn how to swim in it.

I think things will work out properly. I hope. anyway, ais is back and leaving soon. really missed her. she's been a real dear, yet a pain in the arse at times. but throughout her stay she's been really cool. well most pple would be if you're financially stable and have hell lot of time. but i can see how staying in SG would really mess her up. just staying for nearly a month seems to be killing her. well though i don't like the idea of her moving to aussie eventually. i think i would just have to live with it.

for now, i just have to focus on my plans. for now, its to do well in my exams.. erm.. maybe not superbly well, but well enuff to prevent me from spending unneccesary cash on additional terms. =)then eventually to leave the army and focus of doing work outside in the big scary world and eventually earn my keep to start my cafe by age 35.

focus focus focus... everything i do it will have to be for the betterment of myself. not just for the momentary pleasure. but for the eventual betterment of myself.i have to start focusing on my life and how to better it..

i am turning 24.. boohoo...

Today I feel like crap

Today I feel like crap.

Recap for what has happened over the past 3-4 weeks...

I finally completed my LP journey. It was great. Tiring, trying yah.. but it was not that bad... Still tonees to get settled...

Next up on the last day of my 3rd week end. I learnt that Richard passed on.. still tough talking about it. Its not easy to acknowledge the apssing of a friend. Still kinda blame myself for nto spending enough time with him. But I think God he's supposed to be in a better place now....

Flunk my Comm LAW papaer.. but yet i can't seem to study today... Today is just a crappy day.. for some weird reason i can't seem to stay at home alone.. weird thoughts starts to creep in....

Can't seem to work..


Today I feel like crap.

Pst Kong Hee - Love Busters

Pst Kong Hee - Love Busters

Love is a choice and also a very intense feeling...

A relationship cannot be in a sluggish slow mode..

The moment the passion is lost in any relationship, it is fated to end... Falling and tumbling towards destruction.

The good news is that God can resurrect the love.

6 love busters

1) selfish demands
1 cor 13:5
No one can put up with selfish demands forever
Solution: "policy of joint agreement" - never do anything without an enthusiastic agreement from both parties

Always check back and ask how the other party feels about the decision.

Only make thoughtful requests. one must be willin to accept no. Look for a mitiagatimg point.

One should aim for 0 tolerence for selfish demands and requests

2) Disrespectful Judgements

DON'T BE A CRITIC!!!
Don't use concern as a disguise to control and abusive you spouse. Don't ridicule and be sarcastic to the spouse and use the other party's secrets against them EVER!

Instead of disrespectful judgements be a respectful persuasion.

3) Angry Outburst
A verbal and physical attack: creates tonnes of unneccesary fear between both parties.

Purpose of an angry outburst: Punishment!

Solution: confess that you have a temper problem. Undestand that angry outburst is a form of punishment.

Sent from my iPod

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Start of my crazy weekend

I am very tired now. I'm rushing around going for a shoot now.

They ask me what have I been doing that is different on my life? All
my life, I've been pleasing. Pleasing others. Pleasing my mom, my
family, my friends, my colleagues.... Today 2 different people in my
life told me something. I'm over committed. I am so thinly spread that
there isn't enough of me left to go around. How true. What is going to
be different foe me for the rest of my LP and my life? I would learn
to learn to be selfish. I would pit myself first. I would have the
courage to say no . I would only do what pleases me. I would make sure
that I do not have more than 3 main activity my life at any one time.
My school and work are considered 2. so now I would only have time for
1 more. For the next 3 months of would be PVC. then I would place my
heart and soul into my family, work and school. My anchor would be the
church that is all. no more extras... Anymore.

Sent from my iPod

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I am tired: crazy weekend

I am very tired now. I'm rushing around going for a shoot now.

They ask me what have I been doing that is different on my life? All my life, I've been pleasing. Pleasing others. Pleasing my mom, my family, my friends, my colleagues.... Today 2 different people in my life told me something. I'm over committed. I am so thinly spread that there isn't enough of me left to go around. How true. What is going to be different foe me for the rest of my LP and my life? I would learn to learn to be selfish. I would pit myself first. I would have the courage to say no . I would only do what pleases me. I would make sure that I do not have more than 3 main activity my life at any one time. My school and work are considered 2. so now I would only have time for 1 more. For the next 3 months of would be PVC. then I would place my heart and soul into my family, work and school. My anchor would be the church that is all. no more extras... Anymore.

Sent from my iPod

New Email names for you!
Get the Email name you've always wanted on the new @ymail and @rocketmail.
Hurry before someone else does!
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